For someone who is either new to Malaysia’s dating scene or re-entering it for the first time in ages, there are few things as nerve-wracking as a first date. One particular concern that a bachelor or bachelorette may have is how to have a good conversation. Oftentimes, the goal is twofold: to avoid awkward silence, but to refrain from exchanges that seem overly stiff, scripted, or inorganic.
5 Conversation Starters That You Can Use on Your Next Date [image: pexels by ron lach] |
Before you go on your next date, it’s a good idea to prepare a few conversation starters and to have a strategy in place to keep a conversation going. To that end, below are five conversation starters that are appropriate for a first date. These may prove to be very helpful in setting the tone for the rest of the date, as well as allowing you and your partner to be more at ease around each other.
“What Kind of Background Do We Share?”
One of the easiest ways to connect with your date is to start a conversation about things you already seem to have in common. For example, if you met them on a dating Malaysia website or app that featured their dating profile, you can bring up the fact that you’ve worked in a similar industry as them or that you share particular hobbies or interests of theirs.
Do your homework, so to speak, and be prepared to talk to your partner about the commonalities that you’ve discovered. But there’s no need to find out every single thing that you have in common with them in advance—after all, you’ll want them to talk about it during your date!
“What Is Your Ideal Dating Life Like?”
This may seem like a tricky question to ask on a first date, but it is a wise one that will allow you and your partner to learn important things about each other. Based on what they answer, you may be able to tell if you have enough chemistry for a second date, and if the two of you are aligned enough in your personal preferences and lifestyles to continue to spend time together.
Ask them about how frequently they’d like to go on dates, what they’d like to do while they’re dating, and how far they see themselves going in order to pursue a romance. If their answers line up with what you want, you may be able to set up another meeting with them. But if not, there’s no harm done, and you can jump back into the dating pool with the assurance that you and your date were upfront with each other.
“What Do You Like Most about Who You Are and What You’re Doing?”
One of the most effective strategies for sparking a good conversation is to see what ignites passion and enthusiasm from your partner. You can do that by asking them what they like about their current life and why.
The conversation doesn’t necessarily have to be about their work or school life, although it is quite likely that these will come up. Broaden the conversation further by asking them about the pleasures of being a pet owner or a longtime fan of a particular music group. If they seem to light up and become eager to share things with you, that’s a good sign. Don’t forget to proffer your own answer to this question so that you and your partner can have a lively exchange.
“What Is Your Daily Routine Like?”
Another timeless conversation starter that always elicits good answers from dates is the question of what their daily routine is like. You can ask your date about whether they’re a morning or evening person, what conditions inspire productivity in them, what their favourite forms of exercise are, and what they like to do to relax and unwind.
The beauty of this question is that it is so open-ended—and that it provides multiple opportunities for follow-up questions. Like with the other conversation starters mentioned above, this question poses a good opportunity to find more common ground with your partner. If all goes well, it may even be the basis for your next date idea!
“What’s Something about You That You Think Will Surprise Me?”
When it feels like you and your partner have had enough time to conjure first impressions of each other—and to assume things about each other’s personalities—throw them this curveball and ask them about something that may surprise you. This is a great conversation starter for the end of your meet-up, as it allows you and your partner to sum up each other’s characters while ending the date on an interesting note.
Perhaps your date will reveal that they’re a secret karaoke assassin, or that they love to let loose on the dance floor even though most people think that they’re timid and shy. Even it out by also sharing something surprising about yourself, and let them get a closer look at who you really are as a person.
Some Last Tips for Your Next Date
There’s no need to be overly dependent on these questions, as you may get the opportunity to talk about other things with your date in a more free-flowing manner. Try to be observant of which topics or tangents of conversation inspire the most engagement from your date, and then use those as your jump-off points.
Don’t forget to show basic consideration and respect to your date by being on time, keeping them updated about your meeting place, and giving them your full attention when they’re talking. Lastly, be as true to yourself as you can possibly be when you’re conversing with your date, and look carefully for moments where it seems like they’re doing the same. With natural humour and candour on your side, you and your date may be in for something more in the future!
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